I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
