that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
