Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize