talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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