i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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