he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
