no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
