guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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