Say something about gay babies.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
