I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize