Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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