They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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