And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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