3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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