Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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