How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Alive.
So much puke
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
false alarm, still single
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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