Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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