It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
