Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
