dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
