you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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