Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize