Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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