White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
