And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
