her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
