Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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