I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
