There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
