Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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