did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
