sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i would punch a child for taco bell
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
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