Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
