No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
