So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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