I just made out with a guy for $7.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
The adults are the big ones right?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
