So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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