is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
