Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
