the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
