how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
