Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Randomize
