i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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