there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
