VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
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