had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
