I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Watching her eat just hurts me
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
