new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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