Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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