Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I need a burrito and a hug.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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