I'm really into asian looking animals
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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